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Every child is a sponge. It is our role to push more material towards the developing brain of a school kid. If your child is not doing well in his/her own class, he/she is in a situation that must be addressed quickly.  I see the standard of public schools, I do not blame the teachers to proceed slowly - in order to accommodate the slowest child in the class. It fits in perfectly with the great American principle - leave no man behind. Unfortunately not many schools are equipped with special tuitions that help such kids get ahead. Then there is pressure in some other states to complete the curriculum on time. This model does not take into account the child who may not have understood the basic building block of a subject and thus will suffer in any topic dependant upon that building block where the gap is left.

If this is how the whole world worked, there would be no problem but real life is very different. The competitor of a child - even the best child in the county - is not in the county. The competition is going to come from a child who has had extra coaching and extra hours. The better prepared soldier will win.

Identifying the problem

Look at the report cards of your child. Look at the proficiency of your child at his/her homework. Can the child do school homework by himself/herself? Is the child reluctant to go to school? If your child is performing at the level of his/her class, I feel their capability is not fully being developed. If god forbid your child is below his/her grade level, you have a grave situation on your hands.

Effects of the lag

If not speedily corrected, there are many effects of the situation.

It is clear that those who do not do well in a subject are more likely to dislike the subject than those who do well in it. This makes kids less interested and less willing to concentrate in those classes. Remember how you would not like the teacher of the subject you did not like? Remember how the subject you did not like was also the subject you were weak in? All round development of skills suffers.

Children who do poorly in class actually are more likely to become involved with crime or drugs later in life. Just when a parent starts to think -"not my child" there comes a shock to parents. Remember how many things you got involved in as a child and your parents did not know about them? Well I do remember. It scares me to think my son would do the things I did. Each generation is bolder than the previous in doing things that are prohibited.

Sooner the situation is rectified, quicker the child is - in building higher and not just handling crises.

Self confidence is more likely to help the child say NO when it comes to drugs and crime. A poor performer lacks self confidence. This makes the ideal breeding grounds for peer pressure, getting bullied and joining the wrong crowd - the "Lets hangout on the street" kind. Even though your child may say that there are good students who come with him too, rest assured that the majority of the good students  have no time for "hanging out".

Those who do not do well in class are more likely to drop out of school once they turn 16. Kids make many excuses for leaving school. One of the commonest ones is "I do not want to be a burden on you  I want to work". No parent, in their right minds should let a child do that. Eventually, look around yourself and see the son/daughter moving back in with the parent. The school dropout has become a burden. The child will be a burden sometime or another. It is best you give him the discipline and desire to complete school successfully and have him/her addicted to success.

Those who are struggling with academics are less likely to get time for activities that are add-ons in the resume once it comes time for applying to college and scholarships.

Recommendation letters are difficult to get.

Parents of the under-performing child get affected by the thought at their own jobs and happiness dwindles. I get so many E mails for children who are not doing well. Many come from working parents - during their working hours. Why? Of course they are worried about that child who might get left behind. This must reduce the concentration of the parent at work. This slows down the parent's progress. You may lose that well deserved promotion. A young mom in my office recently could not put in her scheduled hours due to a poorly performing child at home. I totally understand. Get the child out of the black hole and she will be performing at top speed again. Until then she loses out, I lose out. I have suggested Kidspan to her.

Siblings learn from one another. There comes an automatic desire in the siblings of a well performing child. I became a doctor because my older brother became a doctor.

The Remedy

There is no high like the high of success. Once we get a child addicted to the high of success, there starts a craving for success. It is just like a drug and it releases similar chemicals in the brain. Get him/her hooked on to this high.

PLEASE SCREEN children for depression and ADHD if they are not doing well in class. We see this undiagnosed and untreated in many under performers. Also think of drug addiction and bullying classmates.

When the same child makes a friend who teaches them without them feeling humiliated before anyone else, they start to truly focus on the subject and start to regain confidence and a liking to the subject. Try and screen the academic performance of your child's friends. Company makes a difference. It is OK to ask a child who is doing well in class to help your child. Kids respect commitments - particularly those who are doing well in class. If nobody can teach the child, think about an affordable solution like Kidspan. In medicine , we firmly believe that one of the worst medicines is one that the patient cannot afford.

Encourage the child with positives towards academics. DO NOT criticize the child for not doing a great job. Most of the time he/she knows there is a problem and is simply too young to think of a solution. They need you for solutions and friendship - not criticism. Use phrases like - "Son I know you are capable of doing much better"  rather than "this performance is unacceptable"

ALWAYS keep an eye out for drugs or signs thereof  in the child's belongings. Most children are wonderful. At the same time they are more prone to peer pressure. I have seen parents succumbing so easily to the pressure of buying brand name clothes for a child. Going in expensive cars and trying to match up to the flashy lifestyle of someone much richer than them. Please do not. Spend more time with that little soul that needs you for guidance and love. Kids are OK with an answer that tells them "we cannot afford it" but in the same breath, highlight a good quality of your child. Teach them about intellectual success and its attractive quality.

Use vacation time for the kids. No vacation should be an unearned one. When you earn it, you enjoy it more and value it more. While all other kids are playing soccer or baseball or have gone to visit in France or Mexico, you should help the child make up for the lag. If you do not do it now and wait for school to open, every child is going to be working just as hard and it will be much more difficult to close the gap.

Kids will always look to us for answers. If we are there from the start, they will get addicted to us. If we are constantly absent from their lives, they will not even acknowledge us when we volunteer and want to be there. 

Knowledge is power and the lack thereof a handicap.  Empower your kids

For your comments, please write to the author of this article education@kidspan.com